8 Months Later

Nearly 8 months after graduating from college:

I find myself living alone, in a studio apartment, in a city which seems to be little more than a sprawling sea of buildings, 50% of which are probably tire centers. I chose to live here, in Everett, instead of Seattle because: 1. I didn't think I could handle the hustle-and-bustle of the city, and 2. I didn't want to drive half an hour to and from work every day. What I didn't bargain for was lack of people my age who are in similar positions in life. I'm just out of college and wanted to take this year to have fun. Instead, I'm finding myself around a majority of people who are transitioning into a more settled period in their lives. While that's great for them, it's not great for my social life.

Most of the people who I'd like to spend more time with do happen to live in Seattle. Now, I'm locked into a lease and live about 40 minutes away from the big city. I should have explored my options a bit better instead of, "How much longer can I sleep in if I live in Everett?"

I can't tell you how much sleep I've lost worrying about my safety and health since moving here. I've seen more arrests in my neighborhood now than I did in 18 years of living in eastern Washington.

A lack of social life. Being constantly afraid in my living arrangements. Uncertainty about my next steps. These aren't the things I thought would take priority over my focus on doing well at work. I suppose this is the harsh reality everyone spoke of. Maybe it's the fact that Cameron's still in college and everything he does seems so free. Maybe it's the fact that when I teach my dance classes, I get away from Everett, and I step into an environment where I have control over my decisions. And maybe it's because when you teach a creative art, you don't have to worry that each move may drive the economy deeper into recession.

I'm not sure, but these are the things I think about now.

On the upside of things, all this deep thinking has led me in a new direction as far as graduate studies go. I'm gearing up to apply to student affairs and development administration programs for 2010. I finally linked my fondness for school and communication/human interaction all together. Excellent. At least I can day dream about that, right?

8 months later, and I've learned more about myself and what I need to be happy. Now it's a matter of staying strong and pushing forward.

Til next time...